Two days back, I carried out a portraiture session in school based on an idea that I had recently. I had to force myself to carry out the session because it has been awhile since I did some personal work.
However, not many people came down for the session and I probably would have to do it again. I guess that being in a business school, most people are generally not concerned with the arts (plus it’s mid-term week, I forgot about that, doh).
Nevertheless, I learnt a bit more about myself during the entire process, how I was concerned not so much with the photographing part but more towards the actualization of a concept. Not sure where I’m going with this though. All I wanted to say was that despite shooting something I wanted, I did not feel that exhilaration that I experienced two years ago.
Back then, I just discovered photography’s ability to transcend aesthetics and how each piece of work could say/mean something else. Everything I shot was suddenly bathed in a golden light of higher meaning (compared to sunsets and snapshots of my feet).
Now, it’s has reached a stage of struggle. I’ve been trying very hard to find that spark in my work. Perhaps it’s the commercialization, perhaps it’s the constant pressure that I place upon myself to create meaningful work. Random street shots had to say something, that abstract shot is no longer cool because someone probably shot it before…and then I find myself not touching the camera at all.
I wish I could go back to that high, to that excitement of a new project; something that will spur me on to create better work. I feel that I’ve walked into a mental block. So I’m wondering how do I get out of the rut and back into the game?
I’m thinking that it could also be that I’m shifting my focus on life away from photography; to my impending graduation and potential career path. In the end, I’m pretty much spent with nothing much left… It fills me with a sense of regret when I think about it. And this is the main reason why I’ve seriously considered not going into the industry. I do not want to end up without a job and a passion if I fail. But still, this begs the question. I still need to find a way to reconnect with myself and you know, be happy shooting again.
Help me, anyone?
11 Comments
Sounds like you’re just going through a creative slump, which everyone hits :) Two things that almost always work for me -
(1) Visit a gallery/read some photo books. I’m always inspired by others’ work, and pretty soon I’m out of my slump. Sometimes even watching a movie works for me.
(2) Shoot anyway. Your photo brain needs to be exercised, like a muscle, and if you’re not using it regularly, it’s harder for it to spark.
That’s what works for me, anyway :)
Hey An Xiao, how are you? Thanks for the quick reply! I’ve been looking at quite a fair bit of work especially for the blog and it doesn’t really help me. I tried taking a break by not looking at anything and it got worse!
I think I might just need to get myself out there but wandering the streets is getting kinda boring without looking out for anything. hmm. I will see what I can do in the next few days. Thanks again!
hi yaohong
i really like this blog! keep up the good work!
what i do in such cases is to switch the gear around a bit, if i dont have anything else, i shop for something. especially old camera gear can be had quite easily and cheap, so trying something new and else is always good, i dont know if you shoot film at all or only digital
what also gets me going is the film development, as it is some kind of process, taking a picture -> developing it yoursself manually -> seeing the result
it’s very good for reflecting after so many days of “waiting” for the roll to finish
hope you get on track again
regards from vienna, xax
it’s funny how I decide to check up on you and realize i just wrote something that is rather related/similar to how you’re feeling now. Check my blog to read the latest article/personal feelings about photography that i wrote.
it’s also something that i felt and am feeling quite abit now. Especially the part where you say:
“perhaps it’s the constant pressure that I place upon myself to create meaningful work. Random street shots had to say something, that abstract shot is no longer cool because someone probably shot it before…and then I find myself not touching the camera at all.”
let me know what you think of what i said. anyways, how’s life in SG? i’m in Norway so out of the world more or less.
cheers,
Shaun
Hi Xax, I totally miss Vienna! It was one of the coolest places I’ve ever visited and I’m done with all the museums yet…Anyway back to you point about switching gear, I agree with you and I’ve actually been doing that recently. All my personal work this year has been shot on film only, 35mm & 120. I’m still missing that spark for my personal work though.
Just shot a performance today for work and it was definitely a very rewarding session as I enjoyed myself. The images were great, definitely portfolio material but it’s different when you’re shooting for yourself (and your own ideals) and trying to deliver something for your clients.
Hey Shaun, saw your pictures a few days back. Love the autumn colors and the beautiful light. Go shoot some of Norway’s awesome landscape man! School’s pretty much boring and I can’t wait to get out in a few months’ time…I guess we all go through this phase in our creative lives and as An Xiao said, we need to constantly shoot and exercise our muscles. The problem with me is that I’m not so interested in aesthetics and the resulting images get very very very mundane. I think I will post on your blog about your ideas. Haha,
Hi Yaohong,
Firstly, I am a subscriber to your feed thru google reader. Its a great contribution, keep up the good work!
i was living in Bangkok and having the same kind of problem as you. I was bored, I had taken all the usual shots of buddhas, kickboxers and monks and would go out all day and come back with nothing. Not one shot.
1) I think a change of scenery is a good idea. Or maybe to move out of your comfort zone and approach a project that you normally not be interested in/familiar with.
2)minimise your equipment when u go out. Just take a nifty fifty or equivelant for your camera.
3) start a project that is really really simple to get off the ground and really easy to pull off.
I think topology projects ( becher style) are a really good idea to get the creative juices flowing. Taking pictures of the same thing but different is easy to do and can be quite fun. How about different hawker shops in singapore? Or more simply, shoot different plates of Bee Hoon Goreng ( yum yum. BTW i used to live in Singapore). You pick a topic and just go with it. It kind of cleanses the mind and give you a fresh start. Zen photography. Youre still taking photographs but you are kind of on autopilot. And you may just have a great project!
So what did I do?. I started taking pictures of electricity cables in and around Bangkok.Thats all i did. Didnt think about composition just did It. Until I found that the work was getting more and more simplified and more and more abstract. i was kind of on auto pilot.
Anyway this cable project has just got me selected for best of show at the International Photography Awards !!. So it can pay off as well.
Last but not least .Try to broaden your horizons. I have just started a blog which is more of a personal scrapbook of creative thinking, it includes photography of course, but my inspiration could be a music video or book or a beautiful woman :) .
Or maybe a few beers would help, but you are in the wrong place for that! beers are so expensive in Sing!
Keep us all updated whatever u do.
Now , back to programming my new website. bummer!
Richard
take time
listen what’s inside
do what you want
youre part of very few people whose work deserves more than money
its just looking in the right direction, not shadow of things, otherwise you already look in the past
Do you perhaps think you’re feeling this way because of what you’ve achieved so far in photography? It’s only natural that when you reach a certain standard, you set new heights for yourself. So for starters, don’t be too hard on yourself to be at your best 24/7, 365.
On touching the camera:
Bear in mind that photography has many outputs.
There are two types of work – You can either do commercial work or personal work.
I guess in this sense commercial work would be much simpler because the client gives you the guidelines. But how about personal work? Personal work can vary from thematic exploration, expression or art (and more).
BUT most importantly, how about taking the word “work” out of the equation? Photography was never meant to be all “work” and no play.
Remember, photography can be as meaningless as it can be meaningful. It is an output of our ideals, a secret passion to capture images around us. Sure, we call a similar string of photographs a series, but there’s always something inside of us just wanting a piece of frozen time, anywhere, any day, any time – with little or no thought to it except to say “we caught that moment, it’s mine”.
Therefore i suggest it is time to pick up the camera – lose your premptive, rational mind. I suggest using your Bessa instead of your 20D. Stop thinking, start shooting (like they tell us). Sometimes you have to discover meaning, not create it.
I understand how you want your work to be as expressive as your soul. But perhaps we shouldn’t be forcing ourselves to produce these images. These things come naturally and not every single photograph we take need to conform to the ideas in your head.
Don’t you think that if you consciously try to express yourselves through your photographs, they become contrived? Letting your shoul shine through your photographs can only be achieved when your emotion takes over. The camera doesn’t exist anymore, but becomes a part of your anatomy, a natural part of you. This is the (in SMU terms) best case scenario. The only other way i can possibly see it working is that you consciously set checkpoints along the way to let your images convey what you want to your audience.
At the end of the day, you’re a great photographer. You’ve come a long way since you first picked up your camera. In some ways or another, you’ve impacted many people’s lives with what you’ve done so far, including mine. It’s okay to take photography less seriously, to use your camera for impromtu, spontaneous shots. Not everything has to be crafted from gold to put a smile on our faces. Shoot in basic jpeg if you must, to take things less seriously (it works for me).
Growth will come once you take a step back and understand who you are, where you are and where you’re going, instead of being on the edge all the time.
For me, I have felt that feeling many times during my life as a ‘photographer’, and when I approach such stages, I paint, or draw, or write. I move my energy to different media. I completely relate though, to the pressure of ‘making’ something work, or that the next thing you do have to be embedded with meaning. But think of it, when you photograph a model (or subject), you would normally take many images, to arrive at the ‘right on’. Think of those ‘bad’ images that you too to arrive that the good one. Sometimes the down energy or lack of inspiration is the very think you need to arrive at something more compelling or interesting. Do your shoot, and if you don’t like it, it’s really okay. When I studied art, it was the process that was important, the experience or witnessing of creating, painting, drawing, photographing. Let’s try to enjoy it, without the necessary criticism of yourself, nor others. Photograph like it was your last first and last image.
thank you everyone again for the kind words of encouragement. Shaun, I wouldn’t think of myself as having achieved much actually but I’m glad I’ve touched your life…;)
I think I’d just have to slow down and get myself out there once again – smell the rain, dance in the surf, to feel alive again. Not dwell on my lack of inspiration. It’s like an endless spiral, you know. Just sucking you in deeper and deeper, the harder you try.
I can’t really give any advice, since I’ve been going through a similar lull in creativity and Shaun already wrote such a beautiful and true response. All I can say is I understand, and it’s true that the more you focus on the idea that ever single frame you shoot has to be imbued with Some Deeper Meaning, it just frustrates you and keeps you from shooting anything you like, or sometimes freezes you up entirely. Anyway, I really love this blog and I’ve found out about a lot of photographers I wouldn’t have known about otherwise. Just keep doing what you’re doing and don’t forget to just enjoy it for a while. Maybe the meaning will come later.